this one is for daemond (and rachel & jason)

When I was three, the thing I wanted most in the entire world was a baby sister. When my mom called to tell me the good news, I was reeeeeally excited. 'Oh, Mom! THANK YOU for the new baby sister!'


I'm a little weird about what I put on facebook. I like sharing things with my friends but I like personal communication so much more. It partly has to do with being so far away but it also has to do something with voyeurism. I don't like being watched. Not when I don't know it, anyways.


My favorite words are 'love' and 'yes.'


Despite having a happy childhood, I have a sneaky suspision I was a sad child. I find evidence of this in the nickname my dad gave me after watching 'Dances with Wolves' (Dark Cloud) and my favorite Care Bear (Grumpy).


I have a 'permanent bruise' on my big left toe from when I kicked my mom in the rib when I was in the womb.


I fed my sister her first pickle.


My mom fell seriously ill with a mystery disease when I was 16. (She's okay now.) At the time, we all tried to help keep the typical routine of things. It turned my world upside down. I never spoke about it with friends. It took me four years to be able to even mention it; six before I could talk about it without feeling... off.


I've baked the pies and crocheted since I was 8 years old.


I have participated in the Fremont Solstice Parade. Naked. Painted. On my bike. It was one of the best moments of my life.


My family only ever calls me 'Carme.' When someone unknowingly gives me that nickname too, I automatically adopt them as family. This has happened three times.


I used to play fastpitch softball. I was a pitcher. I played on club teams that traveled and played tournaments and had wanted to be recruited to play in college. When my mom got sick, it was softball season. Fastpitch retained that memory and I began to hate playing. My mom loved to watch me play. It broke my heart to play and it broke hers not to see me play. I just didn't see the point of it anymore. Most of my old teammates continued on to play for universities.


My all-time favorite movie is 'The Princess Bride.' I used to put it in when I felt sick or couldn't sleep. I never made it past the first sword fight- The one between the Man in the Mask and Indigo Montoya.


I won my dad a milkshake when I was born.


To my mom, home is the place you stay. To me, home is the place I come back to. A lot of our disagreements can be traced back to this one difference in definition.


The first time I heard Cake's song 'Short Skirt, Long Jacket' I was driving between Big Lake and Mt. Vernon driving a white, Chrystler LeBaron. (check out the lyrics)


I want to get the word love tatooed on my left forearm. It's the only thing I really believe in. I want it to be the first word my babies see when I hold them.


I haven't gotten that tatoo yet because I lost my love for the world. When I got back from Italy, I thought I would burst from lack of telling the world how in love with it I was. I was so in love it actually, physically hurt. Somehow, I let the nitty gritty parts of life get to me the last couple years. I left Seattle so I could remember why I love the world. I want to be in love with everything again. There is no reason not to be. I need to prove to myself that the world is lovely and amazing and that I have every reason to be completely smitten with it on a continual basis.


Nothing has ever come close to feeling as good as throwing a riseball other than being on stage.


I don't like liver but I will always try it.


I watched 'The Royal Tenenbaums' on repeat until I could anticipate each and every part before it happened- shots, music, dialogue-- Everything.


I've always wanted to be a spy or secret agent. I will never be recruited for precicely those reasons.


When I was in fifth grade, I technically failed the test on the 50 states but got a hundred percent because of bonus points. (I could name half the capitals.)


I loved The Beatles when I was in Middle School. My first CD was a compilation of their stuff from 1968-72 given to me by my grandma when I was 14. The first track was 'Strawberry Fields.' I hated it. I couldn't understand it. I had only really listened to their happy, poppy stuff. I listened to it on repeat until I figured it out. Now it's one of my favorite songs.


When I was nine, I went through different tragic scenarios in my head before falling asleep. I would think about what would happen if a fire started in our house- where it started in our house, who was home and how we would all get out. It made me feel safe. I attribute this phase to watching too much Rescue 911 and Unsolved Mysteries with my parents before bedtime.


I will always love hedgehogs, naked mole rats and giving out hugs.